30 Days of Truth: Day 1 | Something You Hate About Yourself

Of all the prompts in the 30 Days of Truth challenge, this first one may actually be the most difficult for me. I wish it wasn't, but we're aiming for honesty here. And maybe this first one is the most important one then. Because I am my biggest critic and I shouldn't be.

If it were a bad day and I was asked to write a list of what I hate about myself, I'm afraid that list might be quite a bit longer than you would expect. My anxiety would be up near the top of that list, but I'd probably also include things like my shyness, my fears, silly mistakes I've made, my need for control, etc. If I was having an okay confidence day, I may just list my anxiety and leave it at that. But truthfully, the first scenario may be more common. And anxiety may be what's to blame, because it does eat away at me and make me even more critical. But I don't like simply blaming my anxiety for things and then just dismissing them by telling myself to learn to live with it. I'm frankly tired of using that mentality with myself and, in so doing, inevitably blocking my own growth.

So, I guess above all else, I hate how critical I am of myself. Being highly critical creates an infinite amount of self doubt. It keeps me from trying things from fear of failure. It allows for a false sense of entrapment to rule above everything else. It makes happiness a constant internal struggle.

Here's the thing, you don't have to have your life together at 22. You don't have to have your life together at 35. You don't have to ever have your life together. Because what else is life but messy? Whoever has everything together? Be okay with not knowing what is around the corner. You are allowed to make mistakes. It is perfectly okay to drop everything from time to time when you can't handle it anymore. You can start all over again just because you feel like it. You don't owe success or happiness to anyone but yourself, and you get to define what those mean to you.

30 Days of Truth

I stumbled across Amber's blog Stages of Gold recently. This girl is so lovely and inspiring, be sure to check her blog out. I've decided to take on her writing prompt challenge 30 Days of Truth. It is, simply, 30 days worth of writing designed for the purpose of self reflection to approach complete honesty with yourself. I am taking on this task in the hopes that reflection on these topics will lead to self discovery, if not just better understanding of myself. If I am to complete this, in no way will it get done in 30 days. I will shoot for completing one prompt per week until completed, but they may end up spaced out even more than that. Join in with me if you'd like! Below I have included the full list of writing topics (you can also see them here) that I will update and link to each post as I complete them (you can also find them linked on the personal posts page).

Prompts:
Day 01 : Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 : Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 : Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 : Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 : Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 : Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 : Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 : Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 : Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 : Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 : Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 : Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 : A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 : A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 : Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 : Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 : A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 : Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 : What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 : Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 : (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 : Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 : Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 : Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 : The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 : Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 : What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 : What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 : Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 : A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

I am so excited to participate,  look for my answer to the first prompt tomorrow!
Read more about Stages of Gold's 30 Days of Truth here.

Weekend Wears: Sunday Picnic

My outfit details shirt: H&M kitty skirt: H&M (not online) oxfords: UO a few years ago sun hat: Target a few years ago Will's outfit details shirt: Target (similar) shorts: Old Navy shoes: TOMS

Will and I went on a bit of a spontaneous little picnic yesterday. Once the idea popped into my head I was obsessed with it and planned on making a gourmet selection of quinoa salad and fresh fruit and veggies and cheese and wine. I pictured us on bikes, cruising about through the park. But when 5:00 arrived yesterday and we had been so busy all day, you know, relaxing (read blog work/reading and WoW playing) I wasn't much in the mood to make even a quinoa salad. Because we were both starving. But Will didn't want me to miss out on a picnic I had so badly wanted, so we hoped in the car, grabbed some super classy (but delicious, come on) Subway, and headed to the river. We parked in the park and walked around until we found a relatively (there were lots of people floating the river) quiet spot in the shade to eat. Our bike ride turned into a nice casual greenbelt stroll. We saw lots of cute pups, which made me feel guilty for leaving Pippin home, and it wasn't even too terribly hot! I mean, it was hot, but I didn't die :)

I'd like to start an outfit series, of sorts, here. I'll be sharing a peek at what I'm wearing when we're out doing things on the weekend. I may lure Will into the picture from time to time as well; because he's really adorable and likes to dress to match me. Everyone probably thinks we're gross. In addition I'll share with you where my pieces are from. This will be easy this first time because most of what I am wearing I acquired recently. But truthfully, I do not add new clothes to my wardrobe very often. I'm picky and only buy things that are a good deal and that I really love. I'm also the type to hold onto something special until it falls apart. Some items in my closet I have had since I was a freshman. . . in high school. Others have a great story behind them; you have been warned.

I am also entering H&M's 50 States of Style contest! Could you be so lovely and vote for me? If you have instagram you can like my picture here. You can also vote for me by finding my picture here, just scroll down until you see the sort by options then select State and then Idaho. Thanks, dear.

Scrambled Egg Avocado Brunch Tacos

Am I the only one who eats eggs in tacos? Given the response I always get when I suggest them for a meal, I am starting to believe so. I've finally gotten Will on board with them, though, so I will be eating them alone no longer. Perhaps eggs and tacos seems like a strange combination at first, but breakfast burritos exist and huevos rancheros are delicious. Scrambled egg tacos are actually my favorite kind of taco. Well, aside from Pollo Rey's fish taco but you just can't compete with that. They are certainly my favorite tacos to make; they are so simple and quick.

Plus these have avocado on them as well. I truly believe avocados are a perfect food. You just can't go wrong with them. If you want to make something delicious put avocado in it. Or, you know, just eat one with a spoon. The avocado is certainly what makes these tacos perfect. And these tacos are all kinds of perfect; they are great for those days when you didn't eat breakfast, or at least not much of one, and you're now starving but it still seems too early for lunch. Eat these then. I know that I titled these Avocado Brunch Tacos. But don't let the name of these tacos limit you either; I would eat these anytime (and do). Ugh, so good.

Avocado Brunch Tacos, serves 2 / makes 4 tacos

4 corn tortillas
1/4 cup chopped red onion
1/4 cup chopped green bell pepper
2 whole eggs and 3 egg whites
1/2 cup spinach
1 avocado, sliced
1/2 cup black beans
2 tablespoons sour cream
2 tablespoons pico de gallo
salt, pepper, and garlic powder to taste
fresh lime and cilantro, to garnish

Directions: Put the chopped onions and green bell pepper in a pan with a bit of olive oil (or butter/margarine if you fancy) and cook over medium high heat, stirring often. You don't want to grill these brown and crunchy, just cook until soft and translucent. Beat the eggs and whites in a bowl and then pour in the pan over the onion and peppers. Season with a bit of salt, pepper, and garlic powder and cook the scrambled eggs until completely done. Warm the tortillas up a bit in a separate pan or pop them in the microwave for 10-15 seconds. Spread a thin layer of sour cream on each tortilla and build the tacos by layering black beans, avocado slices, spinach, and the cooked egg mixture. Top each taco with a scoop of pico de gallo and a bit of fresh cilantro. Squeeze a bit of lime over the top as well.

Enjoy, and ignore the comments about how weird you are for eating egg tacos. You know how good they are; everyone else is just missing out.